Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize