In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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