Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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