32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I pour the whiskey from now on
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
