when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
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