My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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