Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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