Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Randomize
