i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
