brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
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