I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Randomize
