the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
