but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
