i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Randomize