I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize
