I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize