I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
