winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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