I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Randomize
