Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
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