Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
foreskin is a definite game changer
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Randomize