my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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