maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Randomize
