i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
