I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize