the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
