i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
