we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Randomize
