woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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