I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
