I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
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