why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
