Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize