Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Randomize
