physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
