"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
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