Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
