don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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