I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Randomize