It's just like the Real World with babies
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
