Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize