if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize