I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
