dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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