Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Randomize
