roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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