a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
a search helicopter?!
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
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