Whoa Z and x make the same sound
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
i dont even know how to be here
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
