I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Randomize
