Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
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