He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
